purrrrrrrrrrrrr

Well, I said I wanted a pair for myself so I went ahead and made some. Screw it. I wanted.

These are made of 100% baby alpaca. The Andean trekker’s spawn, if you will. They’re so warm and soft it’s quite lovely. I went with a really pretty indigo blue color that doesn’t quite translate well on my shitty Fuji camera. The weight is very similar to worsted, but there’s a halo on it that adds some extra puff. I probably should have made these a stitch or two smaller than I did, but it’s not bad. Just roomy.

I opted not to make thumbs on this one. Just the holes. I did this because I didn’t want to take them off; I wanted to be able to just slip my thumb out and slide the gauntlet up my arm if I needed to do something like eat or pee. Laziness, but it works for me.

Anyway I pulled this pattern right out of my bottom. And because it’s a bit more complicated than stockinette stitch, I had to keep notes for the first time ever, so that I could make the right hand match the left hand. I’m not used to keeping notes. It felt weird.

So I wrote a pattern. My first ever, mostly because I hate patterns. But I see how they can come in handy now. I won’t post it here, because no one here really cares and I know it. And that’s okay. I’ve been thinking about that lately, and I have decided to start an actual knitting blog. That way I won’t bore you foodies, and I might tap into some kind of knitting underworld that I don’t yet know of. I know I like getting inspiration from other people’s creations, so why not give something back.

So far I’ve set up the bones of the blog but I haven’t posted my first pattern yet. I think my first will be these gauntlets because they are rad. I have been wearing them nearly nonstop for two days now. My next bit of selfish knitting will be a shorter pair that I can wear while knitting or hanging out at home. For some reason, full gauntlets feel too dressy when I’m braless in a pair of sweats.

If you want to follow me there, please do. I’ll be at knitpickyknits but I’ll still post here, mostly because I can’t abandon Brittany. She totally sucks at blogging.

Thumbs up

My family recently nixed the typical Christmas gift-giving headache in favor of a white elephant exchange. Always a fun time, unless of course you’re the one to end up with the breast pump from 1986, or the Lionel Richie LP. Last year I went home with the home neck traction kit….literally, a neck brace that you attach to a ceiling or door frame and hope not to somehow disconnect your spine. Luckily for me, we also do “hostess gifts”, or more accurately, homemade or otherwise heartfelt little ditties for the women, while the menfolk satisfy themselves with whiskey and pay no attention. Personalized, hand-knitted items are perfect for this, so I'm set.

For my Mom this year, I opted to create a pair of gauntlets. I totally thought I had made up this concept (after years of cutting thumb-holes into my long-sleeved shirts) until I was looking online one day and found a plethora of patterns for these fingerless arm/wrist warmers. I very rarely use a pattern when I knit anyway, so I told them all to eff-off and made these up as I went along. …stealin' my idea.

These are knitted on the round, in a blend of 50% wool, 50% alpaca so they’re sure to be super warm and comfortable. My Mom is into the Rockabilly thing (whatever that is) so I chose red and black stripes with some cool vintage buttons that actually function. Yeah, I learned buttonholes. Yeah, I’m rather proud of myself.

I started with a straight-knitted black ribbing, then joined it together in the round leaving some overlap (for the button), and carried the red and black stockinette stitch up to the knuckles, taking a break to knit straight stockinette for a few lines to form the thumb hole, then joining it back up again. The very top is a repeat of the black ribbing. Then I picked up stitches on the thumb hole and knitted the short thumb on the round. The thumb is kinda shaped, with a few decreases thrown in there for comfort. Then I wove in all the loose ends and sewed on a cool black button. Done. Warmth for Mama, and she can still show off her rings.

Now I need a pair of these for myself, cuz my holey long sleeve shirts are decidedly unclassy.

Unfortunately I neglected to photograph Brittany's gift before wrapping it so hopefully she'll model it in front of a camera soon and I'll share. Cuz it was pretty rad too.

stoopid knits cables

Hi, it's me again. I hope you’re all enjoying the smutty crap Brittany shoots out her word-hole as much as I am. I never knew she could be such a judgmental jerk. How fun.

So, knitting. Again. I know, and I’m sorry. But you guys should really take it up so I can talk about it without feeling like a total asshole. Seriously, it does wonders for stress and Christmas presents.

Today’s installment is cables. You know, like those ugly sweaters the yuppies wear with asgots at the country club? Or something like that, anyway.

I was putting off cables as long as I could out of cowardice. They scared me. They looked so complicated, and I didn’t really understand how a third needle could possibly make the act of knitting any simpler. I mean, I have two hands and two needles. Mathematically, that works out pretty well. But introduce a third, weird little curvy one into the mix and what am I supposed to do? So I had a pep talk with myself and decided it was about time I grew some balls. Big-ass knitting balls.

Turns out, it’s not so bad once you get the hang of it...

ANDEAN TREKKER
This cloche hat was my first attempt, hence the subtleness of the cable. I wanted to be able to abort mission and try something else if the cable didn’t work. The hat is knitted straight in a ribbed stitch, seamed up and gathered on top in the round to finish. The cable accent covers up the seam. This is baby alpaca, which I have decided I want to be touching my body at all times. It feels so effing good. It is, after all, the Andean trekker. …if you will.

SEAFOAM
Another slouch. ‘Cept this one has a thicker cabled band that looks like a wave. The buttons on this one are seashell. The color of the yarn is greener than it turned out in pictures; it’s spozda be turquoisey-blue.

BROWNIE
This has a braided cable band, which is just a scosh more difficult than the normal rope cable. There are two different cabling directions to keep track of, working together in the same pattern to make it look like a braid. This slouch is similar to the rest, but the hat part has a woven stitch which makes for a stiffer drape so it's not as hang-ey. The yarn here is a wool-acrylic blend with bits of colored tweed.

BUTTER
After finally figuring out the whole cabling thing, I wanted to make a cloche hat that had a couple different kinds of cables. This one has a braided cable down the center with two tight rope cables on either side. This is knitted straight, seamed up then finished on the round like the blue cloche, but I allowed a bit of overlap and sewed little white buttons all the way up. This one is 100% wool and looks like it would be kinda itchy, but totally isn’t.

So I think I've finally mastered the elusive cable. Next I want to try a basic ribbed band with the hat part in a cable pattern. We'll see how that works out. And no, I'm still not done with hats. But as soon as I am, you'll be the second or third to know.